matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
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