My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
Randomize