You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
we're so committed to being not committed
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Randomize
