It wouldn't matter if you are Jesus Christ himself, you are not getting into the bar tonight
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
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