i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
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