At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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