If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
