K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
Randomize