Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
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