If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
they're like a gay fantastic four
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize
