Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
Four minutes until I can fart!
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
