Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Randomize
