your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Randomize
