Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize