Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
Randomize
