Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
Randomize
