Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
Randomize
