Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
Randomize
