I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
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