if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
Randomize
