I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
Randomize
