Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
