You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
Randomize
