do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
This is the worst date ever. Pls kill me. No, wait, scratch that, stick to the original plan of killing Paris Hilton, I'll live though this
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
