I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
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