So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize
