I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Randomize
