Hes a 32 yr old divorced sailor that calls me almost every night drunk begging me to call him big daddy. I think i might need to change my number.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
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