i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
Randomize