Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
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