I hate your face
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
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