It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
Do vagina's smell?
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
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