you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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