I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
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