Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
Randomize