Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
Dear drunk me, don't shave my balls til you're sober. My junk looks like a pomeranian with mange.
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
Randomize
