North Korea, Best Korea!
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Randomize
