So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
