..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
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