So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
Febreezed myself at a stop light on the way to the IRS office. Judgmental glare from some old lady in the car next to me, thumbs up from her husband.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
Randomize
