I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Randomize
