Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
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