Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
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