I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
Randomize
