In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
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