ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
Randomize