He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize
