Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Randomize
