I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
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