I swear she didn't look like that last week.
I*** M*****, this is your dignity texting you. I ditched you when you started hitting on bros and old sailor men last night. My friend Sarah has pictures to prove it.
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize
