she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
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