feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
Randomize
